Dying to talk? People would rather talk about death with a stranger than with loved ones

Sue Ryder is encouraging the nation to open up about what they would want at the end of their lives to help normalise these conversations and ease uncertainty for loved ones.

The charity has teamed up with its ambassador Lottie Tomlinson, who talks about her own experience with grief and why conversations around end-of-life wishes are so important.

Despite the country’s reputation for emotional reserve, nearly half (47%) of the nation admit they would feel more comfortable discussing dying and death with a stranger than with someone they love. The trend is even more pronounced among younger adults, with 54% of 18 to 24-year-olds agreeing. Yet one in 10 (10%) avoid the subject altogether.

New research from Sue Ryder reveals that three in five (61%) find it easier to open up to someone they don’t know compared to a loved one, with many turning to so-called ‘professional confidants’ (47%). Barbers (46%), personal trainers (31%) and cab drivers (24%) top the list, followed by bartenders (23%), nail technicians (19%) and even dog groomers (13%).

Men are particularly likely to feel this way, with 67% agreeing it’s easier to start conversations with strangers, as opposed to 56% of women.

Far from idle chit-chat, nearly half (48%) said their conversation with a stranger was more meaningful than one they’ve had with their loved one.

Describing why it feels more comfortable to confide in a professional confidante, 27% said it’s easier with someone who isn’t directly affected and 24% said it’s less difficult to be honest when there’s a bit of emotional distance, while 17% feel less judged, according to the study of 2,000 UK adults. (1)

When it comes to talking about death with family, over a third (37%) hold back because they don’t want to upset those closest to them, while 23% said they feel pressure to stay positive instead of facing the reality of dying, and 21% worry that it would make ‘death’ feel too real.

With two-fifths (40%) unsure on how to start a conversation, and nearly half of adults (48%) wanting to be able to make a start at it, Sue Ryder launched ‘The Cab Fare-well’.

The limited-run initiative offered free black taxi rides with an unusual twist - the only 'fare' passengers were asked to pay was an open conversation about what they would want at the end of their life.

Drivers, trained by Sue Ryder's palliative care nurses, gently guided conversations about death, the end of life and what matters most.

Sue Ryder has teamed up with its ambassador Lottie Tomlinson, who takes a ride in the cab and draws on her personal experience of grief, to highlight the importance of open conversations around end-of-life wishes.

In support of the campaign, Tomlinson is encouraging people to download the 'Your Death Deserves Better' guide and speak to their loved ones about their wishes.

Despite 60% of UK adults having tried to initiate a conversation about dying and end-of-life wishes in the past, and more than a quarter (28%) saying the conversation felt open and helpful, many were faced with barriers. A fifth (21%) admitted they didn’t get very far into the conversation, and it felt emotionally difficult (20%).

When attempting to raise the subject, nearly a third (32%) said they relied on humour to break the ice, while a fifth (21%) approached it indirectly, and 29% broached the subject when discussing writing a will. Others did it by talking about someone else’s experience (24%) or referencing a celebrity's death (14%).

Only a fifth (20%) have clearly shared in detail what they would want at the end of their life and for their death with loved ones. In fact, more than a quarter (28%) worry that bringing it up might upset the other person. This is despite over a quarter (26%) believing having a clear plan in place would give them (and their family) peace of mind.

It comes as seven in 10 people (72%) who have been bereaved in the last five years believe that talking openly about end-of-life wishes in turn gets them thinking about what they want in life. 70% say they have a list of things they want to do to live well, with three-quarters (75%) believing that the certainty of knowing what their loved ones want at the end allows them to focus on the present. Over a third (37%) have created a bucket list, and 44% already have a place in mind they would want to visit if they became unwell.

Lottie Tomlinson, who has previously spoken openly about her experiences with bereavement, following the death of her mother and sister, is encouraging the nation to open up about what they would want at the end of their lives, to help normalise these conversations and ease uncertainty for loved ones.

Lottie said:

“I know from my own experience just how overwhelming grief can be. My mum got ill unexpectedly, and she never wanted to approach the subject that she wasn’t going to make it. There were a lot of unanswered questions after she died that we didn’t know.

“You’re already dealing with so much, and not knowing what your loved one would have wanted at the end of their life only adds to that weight.”

“Having those conversations might feel uncomfortable, but they can make such a difference - giving the people you love reassurance, clarity, and a sense of closeness when it matters most.

“That’s why I love what Sue Ryder is doing with its ‘The Cab Fare-well’ campaign, and I hope the service helps people consider why it is important to have these conversations - I know it has for me.”

There is a clear appetite for change, with 65% believing that some cultures around the world are more open when it comes to discussing death, and 64% wishing that conversations about end-of-life wishes felt more normal in the UK. 63% said they would feel more confident starting these discussions if they saw more people openly talking about the subject.

‘The Cab Fare‑well’ taxi fleet operated in London and Manchester between 23th and 24th April, offering free journeys up to 20 minutes, designed to spark conversations about death and dying.

The campaign followed new research revealing that 41% of people would feel comfortable discussing end‑of‑life topics with a cabbie, while more than one in seven (15%) said they had already had a conversation like this with a taxi driver.

James Sanderson, Chief Executive of Sue Ryder, said:

“Talking to your loved ones about what matters most to you before you die isn’t morbid, it’s a lasting act of love that brings comfort to everyone when the time comes.

“We’ve cared for people with terminal illness for over 70 years, so our nurses know the importance of getting care wishes right for people. The small, everyday details that make you who you are, like your taste in music or clothing, cultural practices, or whether you want your pets with you until the end, become so important in ensuring you have the best possible quality of life.

“‘The Cab Fare-well’ exists to break that silence and help people feel more confident starting the conversation. It’s never too early to have the conversation. Avoiding it could mean people will do their best but may feel uncertainty about not knowing if it's what you would've wanted.”

(1) Research conducted by 3Gem polled 2,000 UK adults aged 18 years or older, from 23rd to 27th March 2026.