Thank you for looking afer me and always keeping me smiling

24 September 2009

When Stephen (43) got married in November 2008 he did not expect to be visiting Sue Ryder - Manorlands Hospice (in West Yorkshire) just two months later to visit his wife Susan (46).

Having met in 2002 Stephen and Sue quickly became inseparable. Although Sue suffered health problems from late 2003 onwards they planned their wedding day and despite being diagnosed with cancer in June 2008, the couple were optimistic and went ahead.

Stephen said: “It was the best day of our lives. Despite Sue’s illness she was in great form that day and we had a wonderful time."

Sadly Sue’s health suddenly deteriorated. She was admitted to hospital in December 2008 and on 13th January this year she was transferred to Sue Ryder - Manorlands Hospice.

Stephen explained they both wanted her to go to Manorlands Hospice because they had heard of the loving care provided there. Although Sue wanted to go to the hospice she was initially very apprehensive. Stephen stated, "However, because of the way she was greeted and because of the loving care she received Sue very quickly accepted the situation. In fact within 24 hours she had settled in.”

Stephen continued: “It is a tragedy that you have to go through the experience of receiving care by Sue Ryder to appreciate what a wonderful charity they are." Stephen talks with affection of the laughter, the jokes and the level of personal care offered to Sue. “We only had to ask for something and it was there. It is incredible but even in the early hours of the morning staff would find time to talk to you - not just to Sue but to any member of the family who was unhappy or distressed." Stephen continued, “I feel very humble, the nurses and staff are so special. Every nurse is different but they all contribute in a very special way. They are extraordinary people - who else but those nurses would claim 'it had been a privilege and a pleasure nursing Sue'."

Stephen and Sue’s family especially appreciated the way the specialist nursing team eased Sue’s pain and “respected her dignity”. They also appreciated that they could stay overnight, indeed Stephen stayed most nights at the hospice while his wife was there. Stephen recalls with a smile when the nursing team built a snowman outside Sue's window complete with slippers and bedpan for a hat.

Finally Stephen wants his wife to have the last word. After Sue died nurses found a card in her bedside drawer. Written by Sue and addressed to the staff the card simply stated “Thank you for looking after me and always keeping me smiling”. "Needless to say when we read the card there wasn’t a dry eye in the room. Her message says it all", said Stephen.

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Sue Ryder

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